Knowles Family is suing Rihanna!
Mathew Knowles, father and manager of R & B supserstar Beyonce, has slapped her rival, Barbados beauty Rihanna, with a big lawsuit.
'I am making it public that I will be in fact be suing Rihanna for over $40 million in damages,' says Mathew Knowles. 'She has been in the music industry for three years and has released over 10 hits back to back to back, without ever taking a break,' he continued. 'That's obviously a marketing strategy that I had originally conjured up for Beyonce ever since she went solo back in 2003, and Rihanna stole the concept right under our noses,' he added.
Beyonce Knowles has also personally slapped Rihanna with another lawsuit, claiming that her relationship with R & B singer Chris Brown is nothing but a copycat of her relationship with her now husband, rap mogul Jay Z.
'This b**** thinks she can get someone as slim as Chris Brown to be hangin' with her in front of the cameras? Hoe, I'm Beyonce and I still got a guy the size of an ape,' she said in a press release. 'There's no way that relationship is real'.
Tina Knowles, mother and hairstylist of Beyonce is also suing Rihanna in damages.
'Eva since Rihanna came out with that Bob thing on top of her head, Dereons Beauty Salon Weave specials in Texas have dramatically decreased in sales,' Tina said in a statement. 'I'm pretty sure the two events are related to each other. There's no way people can resist Grand-mama Dereon (manager of Tina's salon in Texas) and her after church Sunday weave specials' she added. 'Screw the 'bad' economy, there's only one hoe responsible for this!' she added.
Solonge Knowles is also suing the Billboard Hot 100 for allowing Rihanna's songs to appear on their charts, while her songs have totally gotten ignored. 'Last week my first single peaked at #101 before falling to #196 on the Bubbling Under Chart,' Solange said in a statement. 'When I saw that not one, but TWO Rihanna songs were in the top ten, I realized that not only could've my song peaked at #100, but it could've peaked at #99 had Rihanna not been such a c*** blocker' she added.
Jay Z, who was responsible for the breakthrough success of Rihanna's career, is also surprisingly suing the 20 year old hitmaker.
'Ever since Rihanna burst onto the scene, it has affected my sex life with Bee dramatically,' Jay Z said in a statement. 'When I told Beyonce I wanted her to use an Umbrella as a prop in bed, she vowed to never sleep with me again until the entire Rihanna situation was taken care of,' he added. 'It's time for Rihanna to Take a Bow' he added.
Okay, it had me going until the third sentence.
Then I was like, "this is fake!" This is too funny.
Jens Uk Fanatic
I thought it was real until Beyonce's quote!
U know what I mean?
